Life lately…has been a little wild. Remember the Tiktok sound that was like “hi, I’m ryan and my life is kinda crazy” ??? that’s me. I lost one of the most influential people in my life in the middle of June and it absolutely rocked my world. Wrecked it. Trashed it. Destroyed it. And grief came in like a freakin wrecking ball. If you know me at all, you know that joking about it is 1000000% a deflection tactic. And that is what I’m doing right now because ya girl is NOT ready to talk about it yet.
So what do we talk about then? Well let’s start with my hiatus from social media in general. It’s put me behind the ball in so many ways, but I’ve decided that my life is now on my own timeline and not everyone else’s so EXCUSE ME if I don’t have a big following and good statistics or whatever they’re called…engagement. It’s called engagement. I’m working on rebuilding basically everything. I went through this weird cleaning phase and decided to discount a ton of my old art on @thecosmicvaquera and started designing prints for now instead of painting anymore physical pieces until I get some stuff cleared out. Our house is very…quaint lol so storage space is basically non existent. I also switched from a website to a Etsy shop because it’s more user friendly and easier on time management especially managing the blog website too. Speaking of the blog, I feel like the past few designs I’ve posted on the gram have not been my best work. I was in a funk okay? I’m sorry. No one is as embarrassed as I am. Also, I have an interview that I did with a super rad friend from SEVERAL months ago that I need to type up, edit and post so she doesn’t feel like she wasted her time talking to me. (Sorry Soph, I hope you still love me). I have some exciting interviews up my sleeve, but I’m trying to take my time with it because let’s face it…I’m not quite ready for all that. The ranch page is slightly laughable, not aesthetically pleasing whatsoever and it’s shameful considering how nice my horses are. Please whatever you do, do not think that @hd.performancehorses is a fair depiction of my social media skills or the quality of my horses. Yet another thing I need to work on. And then there’s my personal page that makes it look like I’ve fallen off the face of the Earth. Basically I just wanted to prove to everyone that social media is truly a highlight reel and let’s face it, I haven’t had many highlights lately, at least that’s what the grief is telling me.
We’re in the process of selling several horses. We just weaned our foals from this year and I’m listing them as their AQHA papers come in. Speaking of, has anyone else been reminded of the headache that waiting on AQHA paperwork brings or is that just me? I swear it takes longer when I actually need something. I think I’m just ready to get these weanlings sold if I have to sell them. It already makes me so sad so it’s best to just RIP the bandaid off quickly. I’m secretly hoping that my favorite filly doesn’t sell – I guess it’s not a secret if I’m telling the blog and Instagram and Facebook and basically anyone who will listen, but that’s besides the point. She was my Pawpaw’s favorite foal from this year and after losing him in June, I just can’t justify selling her or any foal out of her momma because her dam was also my Pawpaw’s favorite mare (I’ll be hoarding Barbie offspring for the rest of my life). So I did what any sane horse breeder would do. I listed her at a slightly outrageous price and told myself if no one is smart enough to buy her by the end of December I get to keep her. If she sells, it’s God’s plan and if not, well that’s also God’s plan.
Let’s see, what else have I been up to that I can share right now…Oh I randomly decided a couple of weeks ago to start flipping furniture, as if I didn’t have enough going on, but I’m giving everything a retro western vibe, so it’s cool and fun and whatever, okay? Work is good. I still have the joy of talking about horses and nutrition all day, so no complaints there. Daniel hasn’t left me yet, shocking, I know. Just kidding, he’s the best and I’m so thankful for him riding this wave and every other wave with me. It’s pretty cool when God finally sends you your person and then you get to do every day with your best friend. Sorry that was mushy gushy and kind of gave me the ick so I can only imagine how it felt reading it. HA. I finally started riding again after taking a longer break than I’m willing to admit. I’ve been reading, but lately I’ve been stuck on the third book in this series and I’m just not LOVIN it. This is one of the few times all year that I’ve been contemplating not finishing a book, but the thought of that actually stresses me out more than suffering through a book I don’t like, so looks like I’m finishing it. I’ve gotten to spend quality time with all three of my best friends recently and that makes my heart so happy. Oh and I’m finally writing this blog…let’s not ruin a good thing by dwelling on it.
Anyways, all of this to say that life has been a mystery bag of what stage of grief are we in today, but it’s the little things that are the silver lining and for now, that’s good enough for me.
Until next time friends,
xoxo, lex
Cowgal Chatter 